My Friends and Family Kinda Suck...

This week has been tough, and it only got tougher as the week progressed.  Friday and today, Sunday, have been really difficult.  I spent most of the day with my family.  I started out the day with my brother.  Most Sundays we go to church and then run his errands.  I love my brother, but I find him to be emotionally draining.  I work to keep myself on an even keel, but he is high strung and has road rage.  He believes a lot of conspiracy theories which is a little unsettling as well for me.  After that, I went to see one of my sisters.  I enjoy spending time with her superficially and she is easy to be around in that respect.  She is not sympathetic regarding my mental health.  Many times, she doesn't even take it into account.  A few years ago, I grew deeply depressed and just stopped showing up for week.  I ended up in the hospital.  She told me that I abandoned my job.  What makes this especially difficult to take is that she was the one who had me admitted to the hospital!  Her support of my mental health issues has been inconsistent at best.  I think that she is uncomfortable with the thought of either mental illness in general (even though she worked for years at a mental hospital) or my having mental illness.  Regardless, she is uncomfortable with it, so she just doesn't acknowledge this.  I finally realized today that she does this in her own life.  When things make her uncomfortable, she buries it and distracts herself.  Finally, I went to see my niece and drop off some resources that I thought would help her.  I ended up talking to her and realized that I had become very negative.  Her own mental health is not good right now, so I should have left before I did.  I know that she is young (25 yo) but something bothered me about her views.  I really don't think that she has a very good opinion of me.  That hurts.  She does love me, but she doesn't really examine things beyond face value.
The family that I didn't see today has issues as well.  My other sister is verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry depressed, but she seems unwilling to try to get help.  She is waiting to die.  I used to talk to her very often but after I started working 40+ hours a week, I couldn't and maintain good enough mental health to work.  Heck, most of the time I was physically tired as well!  She can't really see past her own misery right now.  Her daughter is a trip and really upset me because she treated her mom, my sister, very disrepectfully.
What I realized today, is that I am feeling alone and unsupported.  I have made significant deposits into people, like my best friend and family.  Even when I was depressed, I would still try to help people by listening to them.  Now that I need that kindness, it is like people are too busy or they don't have the emotional wherewithal or worse, they attempt to make withdrawals from my depleted account.  I really don't want to shut myself off from my friends and family, but I am really hurt by lack of or extremely limited support.  I will have to get some support so that I can get back on track.  I need to find a counselor.  I also plan to distance myself from my friends and family and just have a more superficial relationship with them.  I will have to focus on other things that are more positive.  I am seriously thinking about moving to another city or even state, because being this close to my family is really painful right now.