Sunday, April 28, 2013

Mapping out my improvement plan for the week...

I really need to see what help I can get.  I am still unmedicated and not in therapy.  I am also so tired.  This week, one of my priorities is to see what help I can get.  Another one is to continue looking for a job.  I have some social events planned, too.  I hope that I don't stretch myself too thin.

I am really emotional and it still seems like I am having a tough time with self-sabotage.  There seems to be a big disconnect between where I am and where I want to be.  Sometimes, I begin to think that maybe I can't attain my big dreams, but I can't entertain those thoughts.  I do have to take a look and see why I am not moving forward.

I finally got a paycheck!  It wasn't a lot, but it has definitely helped.  My brother loaned me about $200 which helped TREMENDOUSLY.  I didn't have to take out a payday loan after all.  (Plus I had some "complications" getting one.  I have GOT to work on my finances!)  There was a lot of drama with getting that check cashed but I was finally able to do it!

Brainstorming about what to accomplish this week:
*Medications
*Job hunting and applying
*Cleaning my apartment
*Refreshing myself/rest/rejuvenation
*Spending time with friends and family
*Start working on my business relaunch
*Contact creditors
*Pay bills
*Laundry
*Maybe a movie by myself
*Work on life vision (ideal life)
*Meanwhile plan
*Cook healthy meals
*Get distilled water for my CPAP
*Create a tentative spending plan

I am sleepwalking through my life and I have lost so much of it already.  I need to grab the bull by the horns and do what I can to steer my life the way I want it to go.  I know that I am always tired, so I need to take care of that because it affects pretty much everything else.  I also have to work on getting some meds back into my system.  My sister told me not to make things harder than they have to be and that is what I am doing by not taking advantage of the pharmaceutical help that is available to me.  I guess I will go and map out a plan to get these things done.

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